CGA 2022!

I never, ever imagined that I would be blogging on this platform again. Once I made the decision not to return to the Race, I thought that was it. Truthfully, I told myself I wasn’t even allowed to blog on here again. In my mind, I had failed the Race and told myself that I couldn’t be associated with AIM anymore. 

Some pretty great people called me out and told that that was kind of ridiculous. 

This year has been hard for me. It has been a rollercoaster of health scares & loss & heartbreak. There have been so many hard things that have brought so many hard emotions. There were times that I was so angry that I ran from God. There have been other times where I clung to Him like my life depended on it because I was afraid I would fall to pieces if I didn’t. There were times I was giddy with excitement and other times that made me want to fall to the ground and wail. 

One time I actually did. 

In the midst of all of this, though, was a God who was holding me together. A God who saw my heart, my struggles, & my pain and asked me to be fully present. To be completely settled where I was at. To sit in my feelings, to invest in those around me, and to be present in every moment of my life here. I hated it at first, because honestly I wanted to be anywhere else but in those tough moments. I wanted to be obedient though, so I gave it a shot. It was then that I was reminded how I liked being obedient, because apparently God does know what He’s doing 😉

For six weeks I tried to be as present as possible. I stopped to admire the sunset more. I hung out with my family more. I hung out with my friends and called to catch up with old ones. I cried and listened to sad breakup songs when needed. I danced in the kitchen while making pizza with my coworkers. It was heart wrenching and beautiful all at the same time, and God did not fail to knock me off my feet. He had me dreaming about all the good things He could do through the hurt. He had me weeping at my brothers soccer game when He reminded me of the times that they were 7,000 miles away and all I could do was pray for them. 

I should have known that with all of the “living in the moment” I was doing, there was a reason for it. 

Last month I flew to Georgia to visit my friends from the Race. They are currently living in Gainesville for a program called CGA (Center for Global Action). CGA is a discipleship/leadership program for previous racers. I got to sit it on house church with them and hear about the things that they were learning during that time. During my time with the Father while I was there, you can probably imagine what He asked me to do. 

Long story short, I submit my application while I was still in Georgia, and two weeks later I interviewed and was accepted. I am moving to Gainesville in January! 

There are a lot of things that I want to say, but I would probably have to write a book to say it all. I am excited & grateful & a little nervous but it’s okay! I love a good adventure and I’m excited to know the Lord on a deeper level, as well as to be living in community with other believers again. Regardless of the hurt this year has brought, I am learning to be grateful for it, because without it I wouldn’t be where I am now, and I wouldn’t get to be calling Georgia home soon. 

Someone pinch me.